I read a lot. At any given time, I may have four or five books going at once. So when I watch a movie, I want to sit back and be lazy. Having to frantically read subtitles doesn’t seem relaxing.
Now I realize that sometimes they may be unavoidable. Foreign films are made in another language (that’s part of what makes them foreign films), and I’m prepared for that from the outset. But frequently, an American or Canadian movie that depicts a foreign setting starts out in the language of that setting, with accompanying subtitles. Then, about a third of the way through, something changes and the characters are suddenly speaking English. Why not just use English in the first place? We all know Nazi soldiers spoke German and Roman gladiators spoke Latin; if they’re speaking English in the movie right from the beginning, we accept the gift without protest, silently thank the director, and move forward. But when the characters start out speaking a foreign tongue, then abruptly switch over to English, I find it jolting. I wonder what amazing language course these guys took, and if it’s available for Italian. Most annoying is when some of the characters make the switch while others don’t — now we have the jolting change and we still have to deal with subtitles.
The subtitles are especially maddening when they’re flashed on and off too quickly. Most baffling is when they’re written in white letters and placed against a light background. These are high-budget movies with intricate plots and sub-plots. The producers spent millions of dollars on actors, sets, costumes, transportation, equipment, computer graphics, and special effects. The credits at the end of the film show the names of hundreds of people who worked on the production. Didn’t anyone notice that the subtitles are hard to read? I have enough trouble following the action when I understand the language.
You may be wondering why I don’t just avoid movies with subtitles. I try. But sometimes they surprise me, appearing in films in which I wouldn’t expect to find them. Then what am I supposed to do? I’ve invested all of that time in watching half a dozen previews, copyright warnings, and opening credits. Do I bail out? Or do I sit there, straining to read barely legible subtitles?
I do have a plan. From now on, whenever I go to a movie, I’m taking a book with me. And one of those tiny, clip-on reading lights. If I have to read, at least I’ll know what’s going on.
Mostly Bright Ideas 
Marie M
June 24, 2010
[Second note to self: You may be on to something with the book idea.]
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bronxboy55
June 24, 2010
At least if you’re watching at home, you can press Rewind and try to read the subtitles again. In the theater, you get one chance.
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Amiable Amiable
June 25, 2010
Instead of the light clip for your book, I find there’s always someone talking on their cell phone during a movie at the theater. Perhaps the glow from their phone would “illuminate” your pages. Now, there’s a post waiting to happen!
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bronxboy55
June 25, 2010
I just checked ticket prices at our local theater, and they’ve gone up again — a lot, and just in time for summer. Maybe we’ll stick to the seven-day rentals at Blockbuster. If you think there’s a post waiting to happen, it’s all yours!
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absurdoldbird
June 27, 2010
Even worse are the subtitles that take up two thirds of the screen, are in white and yellow or yellow and blue or a similarly unreadable combination.
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bronxboy55
June 28, 2010
I don’t think I’ve ever seen subtitles that large. We just finished watching “The Blind Side,” another one of those based-on-a-true-story sports movies. At the end they put up titles to explain what happened later in real life to the main characters, and they flashed by so quickly we didn’t catch half of it.
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Wyrd Smythe
January 25, 2013
In The Hunt For Red October they did that trick where the Russian officers start speaking English. I liked it. It provides a flavor of being Russian without making your read the whole movie.
With genuine foreign films, of course, the film is in the language of its country, and I always try to avoid dubbed versions. I want to hear the film in its original language and in the voices of the actors, so there is no choice but to read the film. With really good foreign films, I sometimes watch them a second time with the sub-titles off so I can focus on the visuals.
(I’m a fan of Asian films, so it’s a common deal.)
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bronxboy55
January 28, 2013
Sometimes I wish British films had subtitles. I don’t know what language they speak over there, but it sure isn’t English.
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Wyrd Smythe
January 29, 2013
The call it “the Queen’s English,” dear chap, and they speak it over tea and scones! Sometimes I’m not sure which Queen they mean… Freddy Mercury?
Mostly they do it out of revenge for that whole American Revolution thing…. they never quite lived down “the American problem.” hee hee hee….
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